This is the "About Us" section, but since I'm the sole author of this blog, I think it would be just dumb to write "About Us", so I'll call it "Who Am I?", plus following the rules is kinda boring.
So Who Am I? I'm the guy that wake up everyday, look in the mirror and wonder why I'm so sexy!
Ha! Got you! See, it wouldn't be Survivor related if lies and egos are not involved.
I'm a Survivor fan, I've been watching Survivor since I was sixteen years old, ever since Hatch's fat ass landed on that island. I haven't missed an episode, and I watched some seasons more than once. Yes you are right, I'm an addict, survivor geek, whatever you want, but I'm still awesome and you still suck.
My favorite Survivor players are the smart funny evil ones, Cesternino, Fairplay, Hatch, Hantz, Parv, Tyson, Mariano... Yea big list but you get the idea.
My least favorite Survivors are the dumb evil ones that lack the self awareness and think they figured everything out. So if it happens that you're a former, current or future Survivor cast and reading some bad things about yourself on this blog, well, stop crying, I don't care, you can just close this window.
I don't live in the USA, so I never get to watch Survivor right on time, I usually watch it few hours after the West Coast. I live in the total opposite side of the world, in a small tiny little non-heard-of corrupted greeny country called Lebanon. I speak three languages: English, French and Arabic (aka Terrorist Language). In addition I speak a unified language called: Sex.
If you ever message me in French or Arabic, I'll google your address, fly there and punch you straight in the face. Sorry French people but your language is only useful to impress girls. And Arabic people, I'm sure none of you is reading this, you're probably busy googling how to build a bomb and be cool, and well if you're reading this... The truth does hurt.
I don't usually try to hurt other people's feelings, but I was told I'm the least offended and the most careless person in the universe, So because I don't care, I expect others to not care. But If you're reading this or any other post on this website and you feel offended, well boohoo, go tell your mommy, I'm sure she will make you feel better. See what I did there? I'm just insensitive.
Congratulations, you're still reading up to this point, I think it means you're curious, interested in getting to know me or just a boring person in real life and has nothing else to do. Either way, I'll pretend I'm a nice guy and say Nice to meet you too, but Sorry, I'm busy and I don't wanna be seen hanging out with you.
One more thing, all the Survivor Photos, Videos and whatever are courtesy of CBS, so yea, Thank you CBS for creating Survivor and wasting Ten Minutes of my life writing this post and probably many hours in the future trying to fill this blog.
On a scale from 10 to 10, how cool do you think I am? Please leave all your comments below and make sure to compliment me. I promise I'll frame them and read them every night before going to bed.
OMG You sir are my hero. I couldn't wake up every morning and do this. You are my inspiration to achieve greatness. I would really enjoy moving to your home country so you can take me under your wing and show me how to write amazing survivor blogs.
ReplyDeleteDear Reader,
DeleteThank you very much for your interest in my blog.
I'm glad that I was able to inspire you on how to live your life. You just made my day. There's actually a tear in my eye.
In normal circumstances, I would love to hang out with you and take you under my wings, show you how to write blogs, be awesome and get laid. But judging by the time invested in reading this page and writing a comment, I believe you're a boring person in real life. Please don't take this as an insult, but if I want to die out of boredom, I'll give you a call.